Tuesday, August 27, 2013

The Promise

Connie Rossini wrote in Catholic Spirituality Blogs Network - "Everyone has an idiolect - a collection of personal speech habits that is different from anyone else's. Have you ever thought about your spiritual idiolect?  Since your soul is unique, you have a personal way of speaking to God that no one else completely shares."

I pondered this question for weeks. How do I speak to God? How do I communicate with him? How do I relate to God? What feeds my spiritual life?

My first thought was the word Listen.

Listen is the first word of the Rule of St. Benedict. As a Benedictine oblate, I try to listen to God's voice. I listen to God's voice within my heart. I listen to God's voice in others' voices. I listen to God's voice in the events of my daily life.

What is more delightful than the voice of the Lord calling to us?
 St. Benedict

My second thought was the word Look.

I look for God everywhere. I look expecting to find him. I never ask the question  - where is God? I know He is present. And because I know he is present, it is just a matter of "how" he is present. How will I find God? Where will I find God?

When I was a child, one of my favorite movies was the Easter movie, "King of Kings." I loved that last line spoken by Jesus - "And behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age.” (Mt 28:20)

Even at that young age, I recognized the significance of this promise. And through the years, that scripture verse has continued to be my favorite.

When I was a little girl, I was alone with a big secret. My father was sexually abusing me. But somehow, I found Jesus in the small church in our town, and even as a little girl, I felt drawn to the church. I would often walk there by myself. It was my safe place. It was my home.

Jesus has always been with me. And so I know, if he was with me then, during the worst time of my life, then he is with me now and always will be. He helps me carry my crosses and He fills me with joy.

And so I listen for His voice. I pray to him, knowing he is here.

I may doubt many things. I may become frightened or depressed. But I never doubt Jesus' presence. I know Jesus never leaves me.

I know because He promised.

10 comments :

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Daily Grace said...

Trust in the Lords promise can see us through many things. Thank you for sharing this and for the reminder and encouragement you give us that he is with us until the end of the age.

Colleen said...

Daily Grace, thank you! We all need that encouragement, don't we?

Colleen said...

Melanie - thank you!!

Patricia said...

Colleen, thank you for this beautiful sharing. I felt that I was walking along right beside you as you slowly discovered the Lord's Presence. PS Love King of Kings too :) It was a childhood movie for me as well...and made an impression that is unforgettable.
Blessings...and happy weekend to you.

Colleen said...

Patricia, thank you!! Amazing how that movie has affected many of us, eh? Shows the influence a good movie like this can have on people.
God bless you too!

Nancy Ward said...

My faith was strengthened as a teenager when I saw King of Kings in the basement of my beloved Protestant Church. Turns out he is King of Kings of all denominations! Your insight is precious and I know how it is to often sense him near and try to hear his voice clearly.

Colleen said...

Thank you Nancy! I am finding out I was not alone, watching and loving King of Kings!